Irma-geddon

It feels strange not heading into this storm in a Humvee like I’ve head in to so many others in the past.

Torn rotator cuff, cops circling my house all day with the loudspeakers to evacuate, but I’ve got the cat carriers ready to go, guns loaded, empty storage bins that will be filled with water, a handheld pump that should make sewage drinkable (although it will probably still taste like sewage), and somehow ive become the Voice of Reason keeping family and friends calm while trying to maintain my own sanity.

Oh, and I had to block my Asshole Best Friend tonight. He was angry that he hasn’t been able to reach me to chat today and I told him I didn’t have hours to sit on the phone right now. Also, I don’t want to talk to him when he’s drunk. So he flipped out and text “You’re my best friend and I cant get shit from you”. Sorry, but not during an incoming CAT 5 storm, you can’t. Plus, I already offered you a kidney so you cant claim I give you nothing. But I lost my temper, cussed him out, and blocked his number. I feel terrible about that but hes safe in the NE and there’s nothing I can do for him until “Irma-geddon” passes.

I ignore media and focus only on reports coming in from NOAA. When people post alerts that “there’s a pallet of water at Publix on the corner of….” I inject a snarky comment “Y’all too good to drink out of the hose?” with a picture of 5 gallon storage containers and the reminder “5 drops of bleach per container, not per glass”. I try to dispel misinformation (“Zello” will not work in a power/wifi/cell/blackout), because false hope is even more dangerous than reality. How many people will panic when they are unable to reach anyone on that app in a real communications blackout?

Truly, I am concerned about everyone. My mother is fresh out of surgery and unable to travel. Otherwise I may have insisted on them packing up their zoo and heading up to her vacation spot in the Smokies.

But I also recall Waveland, Mississippi. Folks squatting in squalor amid the ruins of their homes. All we ever saw or heard about was New Orleans but the coast of Mississippi was flattened like Hiroshima 1945. And those people were smiling because they were ALIVE.

Yeah, Harvey sucked. Irma is gonna suck and then there’s Jose brewing right behind her. All we can do is prepare the best we can and then deal with the aftermath. Worrying changes nothing.

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