“No you can’t find nothing at all if there was nothing there all along” Death Cable for Cutie

I’ll be hiking in the woods next week and working on my mom’s house as much as I can accomplish by myself. But I’m not asking for your help again. Ill Wave everytime I pass your exit but I won’t stop.

I thought I knew why G-d put you in my path. But maybe it really was nothing more than to get you through a rough patch. And that’s done, you don’t need me anymore. I wont ever mean to you what you do to me, as a friend or anything more.  But I love you anyway and you’ll never know another woman who could have been better to and for you. Goodbye.

(I finally did it. I blocked his number. He doesnt need me to “be there” for him anymore so i dont feel like Im abandoning him. I had become the person he reaches out to when he was drunk or bored.
He would drop anything for her. He cared for her, an abusive manipulative narcissist…more than he ever could or would care for me.
By blocking his number, I reclaim some self respect. That anxiety of “when will i hear from him?”, “who is he with?” And “what will he say to hurt me?”…I feared hearing from him and not hearing from him. So now i CHOOSE not to hear from him.

No more broken plans, casual disregard, mismanaged expectations, growling over bones of drunken affection, and breath holding…

I took control back.

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