Goodnight. Haven’t said that in a while.
Did something else I haven’t done in a while too. Meditated. Prayed. Ritual. Anointed, engraved “YWH” and his initials into a white, a black and a silver candle (silver for the moon). Also took a ritual bath. I didn’t try to focus on anything in particular but rather NOT focus on certain things in particular. I didnt even write out a prayer for the altar.
The new foster dog was mesmerized by the candles. Stared intently into them. I thought “Ritual meditation. A 7 month old puppy is doing it right and im not”. Struck me funny.
The candles have about an hours life left. I let them burn down. Its part of the process.
My skin is warm and smells of neroli, rose water, lavender, doves blood…and some other oils and herbs I steeped into the bath. I almost considered adding a teaspoon or two of Winterberry green tea from Teavana into the tub. Ive become a tea whore since cutting back on coffee. Someone could literally drop a car payment in that place. Its ridiculous. And Im drinking their kool aid. Er, tea.
In bed now. Dog is passed out and I should be too.
A friend asked why I hadn’t blogged in a while and its because rather than being cathartic, to write about what I am going through is more like slicing open the fresh sutures of a deadly wound.
So for now, I will simply wish you well on this Leo Moon and goodnight…